In the Mirror Lifestyle of the online webpage, I found an article by Coleen Nolan. This website is an online version of ‘The Daily Mirror,’ a tabloid newspaper. “The Daily Mirror is published by MGN Ltd, part of Trinity Mirror plc, the UK’s largest newspaper publisher.” Ms. Nolan has a write in column in which she addresses the stories and comments of her readers. These publications are from London, but they are a relevant discussion of Family Discipline versus Parenting Discipline Methods.
Family Discipline versus Parenting Discipline Methods
“My toddler is barely out of nappies but my in-laws think he should be more grown up”
“Dear Coleen,” “I have a two-year-old son who is very similar to all his little friends.”
“In other words, he’s a normal toddler.”
“Whenever we go to my in-laws, however, they expect him to quietly sit at the table and have lunch, which often goes on for more than an hour.”
“At home, he eats lunch at midday and is finished in 20 minutes.”
“But at their house, they serve lunch at 2pm by which point he’s hungry and tired …”
“They’re always making comments about how I need to discipline him more …”
“Coleen says..” “You’re right. Your in-laws sound as if they’re from the generation ¬that thinks children should be seen, not heard.”
“… he’s your son and you should do what you think is best.”
“To expect them to eat late isn’t …”
“Like you, I found it hard not to feel judged.”
“Maybe invite them to your house so your boy can play around as you all talk to each other.”
Coleen is a columnist and has to play to her readers. I would say that she might be jumping ahead too swiftly, as she may not have the full story on Family Discipline versus Parenting Discipline Methods. I heartily agree with Coleen on each set of parents making the decisions as to how their child will be raised and disciplined (which is actually teaching and training, not punishment, or control). It is so very hard to get a toddler on a schedule that works well for the whole family, it is unreasonable for anyone to expect that to be altered or modified in a temporary arrangement, or on a more permanent basis. Toddlers can become ‘out of sorts’ for long periods of time with such a disruption in schedule. It seems radically unfair to the toddler. Well, it doesn’t matter what Mom ‘feels like,’ but it does matter that she make the best possible decision for her child. All parenting decisions are better based on the best interests of the child. Learning how to deal with in–laws is another matter all together.
Attempting to acceptance or at least a middle ground within the family is a commendable goal.
To Your Parenting Success!
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